YOLO or N.E.R.D.?
You Only Live Once or No one Ever Really Dies?
As a kid, when I thought about death, it terrified me and made me cry. Sometimes, I would close my eyes, hold my breath, and imagine the endlessness of never coming back. A permanent end. Nothing forever. Death was something to fight, fear, resist, avoid, something that made you play everything safe, something that made you play small.
My feelings on death have changed over the years and in all honesty, I think we die many times in our lifetime(s). Any significant hardship that we endure that breaks us down, makes it hard to breathe, makes us bleed, makes us cry in pain, certainly can feel like dying. But then we heal and become something new. We transform. I imagine death being easier in comparison. All you have to do is let go. Release. However you feel about death is your own truth and that’s all that matters. It’s personal and not a place for judgement.
Here is my truth on death: The more connected I am to spirit, the more I believe that no one ever really dies (N.E.R.D.). Often I witness the spiritual realm while doing energy work, which I find deeply comforting. It’s the realest thing I’ve ever felt. That’s why it’s MY TRUTH.
The first and only time I took Ayahuasca, I understood death. I felt infinity, the vastness of the Universe, and a never-ending stretch of being in existence. It wasn’t the forever nothing I thought it was as a kid. It was forever everything. It was an overwhelming promise of expansion. We go EVERYWHERE. But it taught me that I wanted to have my feet planted on Earth, I wanted to be home and grounded, I wanted to be in my human existence for as long as I could, and that that infinite experience after physical life will be there waiting for me, when I’m ready. At the time, I was becoming obsessed with my spiritual journey and involving myself in every workshop, gathering, session, I could find. Ayahuasca taught me very clearly to slow… the fuck… down. Our spiritual road is long and there is no rush.
If you’re open to the idea of never really dying and that your energy, your spirit, lives on; then you might live your life more like you only live once (YOLO) because you won’t be afraid to die. The fear of dying is the fear of fully living. Fully living is LIVING BIG. REALLY, REALLY BIG. BE SEEN, BE HEARD, LOVE EVERYONE, FEEL EVERYTHING, don't play small.
Think of all the legends who passed on this year. Think about what each of those icons represented in their physical being on this Earth. They LIVED BIG. Muhammed Ali, Prince, Phife Dawg, David Bowie, Sharon Jones, George Michael, Leonard Cohen, Carrie Fisher, and so many more. Think about what they taught us, who they were, what they fought for, what stories they told, how they lived their lives. They all taught us valuable lessons about humanity. Now think about what’s going on in the world today. Right now. If you believe in spirit, if you believe in energy, if you are open, then maybe you will believe that these people passed on to be more expansive. To be even BIGGER. I believe that these heroes passed on to help behind the scenes, for us to channel their power when we need them. And we need them. They are now available to all of us at any given time.
We took big hits this year and we're hurting. I can’t imagine that anyone got out of 2016 unscathed. I think parts of each of us died. Our collective wounds have been aired out and now they can finally heal. We have to do the work to heal. It won’t be easy but it will be beautiful. These are growing pains. The destruction is necessary for us to rebuild something better in it’s place. 2017 is our rebirth, our transformation. Drop the weight of this year from your shoulders. Let 2016 go. Let it die. Don't bring the hardship with us. It's not us anymore. Call on each other for help. Call on your heroes when you need them. Be a hero when someone needs you.
This is elevation. This is evolution. We're going to be ok. We're going to be incredible. Happy New Year!